Cards 13–14 and recording space

Cards 13–14 · print and cut apart

Card 13 of 16 — The Family Fair Schedule

Read this fictional scene, question, and first draft. Record your revision and why it fits; correct unsupported statements that conflict with it. Use extra paper, dictation, or your usual response method if needed.

The fair schedule listed a start time beside each activity and gave every activity a room name. Two families asked the organizer where the puppet show would be. The organizer added a room number next to that show. On the next visit, both families went to the listed room. Student draft: “The blue and gold schedule made everyone excited.”

Task: Question: What information helped families find the puppet show? Remove the unsupported idea and replace it with a detail that answers the question.

Card 14 of 16 — Reading Nook Location

Read this fictional scene, question, and first draft. Record your revision and why it fits; correct unsupported statements that conflict with it. Use extra paper, dictation, or your usual response method if needed.

The book club compared two places for its reading nook. The mural wall had bright paint, but there was no room to sit nearby. The quiet corner had three chairs and space to open books. The club chose the quiet corner so members could sit while they read together. Student draft: “They picked the nook because the mural was pretty and everyone liked it.”

Task: Question: Why did the club choose the quiet corner? Remove the unsupported reason and replace it with the detail that supports the decision.

Revision recording sheet · Cards 13–16

For each card, circle the revision move, write or dictate your change, and name the printed detail that supports it. Explain why the detail fits the question. Use extra paper if needed; a clear combined sentence may give both the revision and its explanation.

Card 13

Revision move (circle): add evidence / explain link / narrow claim / remove or replace off-topic material

My revision:

________________________________________________________

Evidence and why it fits:

________________________________________________________

Card 14

Revision move (circle): add evidence / explain link / narrow claim / remove or replace off-topic material

My revision:

________________________________________________________

Evidence and why it fits:

________________________________________________________

Card 15

Revision move (circle): add evidence / explain link / narrow claim / remove or replace off-topic material

My revision:

________________________________________________________

Evidence and why it fits:

________________________________________________________

Card 16

Revision move (circle): add evidence / explain link / narrow claim / remove or replace off-topic material

My revision:

________________________________________________________

Evidence and why it fits:

________________________________________________________